Staying Sane

My online writer friends and I have been talking about the perils of social media lately. Writers have to build a social platform because so much of what happens in business these days depends on social media outlets. I know a lot of authors who feel pressured to show up on every site and they feel overwhelmed with the job. I hate to tell you this, Facebook, but a lot of people don’t like you. They say the reason FB works regardless is because it’s bred into us to like to tell stories and jokes and entertain, as it provides us social proof of our value.

A few years ago, when I started to think about building my 'brand' (based on the author branding plan, Primal Branding by Patrick Hanlon), I was running around like a headless chicken. I stuck a finger in every social media pie until I ran out of fingers. I found it impossible to keep up with them all. My writer friends over at Writing for Children and I decided that the only way to stay sane was to cut down to the social media options we most enjoyed.

It’s a simple principle, one in which my eleven-year-old heartily agrees. Sam has Down Syndrome. We have a monthly calendar for him of what he’s doing each day with moveable sticky words. Sam likes to take all the ‘school’ stickers off his calendar and change them for those marked ‘holidays’!

 

 

Taking a leaf from Sam’s book, I quit a bunch of author sites, deleted certain updates, unsubscribed from other things, and I whittled my social media presence down to a top three sites I knew I could consistently enjoy. Works much better, and I feel it's got to be more sustainable in the long run. Sam likes to encourage me with the words, "Mama happy." Words to live by. 

 

The wonderful author and blogger, Joe Bunting wrote a great post this week about how much we authors need each other. From the post, I tweeted:

@yvettecarol1

Great writing creates a deep connection with others. But you can't connect if you're afraid. ctt.ec/N1xdd+

If I may, Joe, I’d hasten to add another line:

And you can’t connect if you don’t genuinely want to be there.

Being our authentic selves online is the way we represent who we are.
I think the idea of being able to ‘do it all’ is a modern myth.  I say, do what you like to do, so that you have enough time left in the day to write (or do whatever your joy is). And don’t worry if your absence disturbs/upsets some people.

Remember, "If you intend to write as truthfully as you can, your days as a member of polite society are numbered, anyway.” ~ Stephen King

 

 

 

Talk to you later,

 

Yvette K. Carol

Standing strong

       A friend invited me to join the Insecure Writers Support Group and as the first Wednesday of every month is officially 'our' support day, here I am! For my first posting as part of the group, I've chosen a topic that has come up a lot lately - that of other people's opinions. A long time ago (I’m embarrassed to say how many years), my eldest sister said to me, “You’re living pie-in-the-sky, when are you going to come down to earth?” She was of course referring to this ridiculous business of writing stories for children.

Talent is what they say
you have after the novel
is published and favourably
reviewed. Beforehand what
you have is a tedious
delusion, a hobby like knitting.

(Author, unknown)

We were discussing this very issue recently over on Writing for Children, where upon swapping stories, we discovered we’d all felt the sting of doubt expressed about our writing, from our nearest and dearest. Then, coincidentally, the next day the topic came up again on Facebook. A friend here in New Zealand posted this update: ‘I spent an evening with people who work in government type jobs. After explaining how long and what it takes to put together a non-fiction book, two comments are still rankling with me, ' How nice that you can make a wee bit of money from your hobby,' and, 'It must be lovely to indulge your creative desires all day.' I just know it shouldn't irritate me so much but...I did say ' I DO work you know!'

Number one and two on author, A.J. Irving’s list ‘What NOT to say to children’s writers’ (from the blog post Top Ten Ridiculous Things People Say to Children’s Writers), were ‘I wish I had time to write a book’ and ‘Writing is a nice hobby’. Hands up among the writers and artists, who has heard a version one or other of those chestnuts?

Irving’s answers: Really?! Who HAS time to write a book? You make time. You wake up early. You go to bed late. You write while your kiddos are napping. Whatever it takes…you keep writing.

And...

Writing is a career choice. It takes ambition and persistence. This is what I want to do. This is what I have to do. I am a writer.

Yeah, what she said.

If the naysayers around you are getting you down, then go spend time with your kids, or your pets, it always works for me.

The kids and Bolt remind me to sit and scratch smell the roses.

 

They remind me that sometimes you need to bite off the leash that binds you resist negative opinions.

 

And most of all, they remind me to stand strong or as they say here, Kia Kaha!

 

Thanks for reading!

Till next time...

Yvette :-)